The ‘Ice Cream Man’ Doesn’t Define Your Worth
RAYE, one of Saturday’s headliners, broke into the mainstream in 2024 when she won a record-breaking six Brit Awards. Yet while her music often features upbeat, infectious instrumentation, her lyrics sometimes explore territory that is anything but lightweight.
“Ice Cream Man” is a powerful example; a painful yet tenacious story about being used and abused by a producer who seemed able to advance her music career. At the 2024 BRITs, RAYE performed a stripped-down version of the song, altering the chorus to: “Cos I’m a woman of faith, a brave, strong woman.” The change to “of faith” seems more meaningful than simply avoiding an f-bomb on live TV.
At a deep level, we all know that a man should not take advantage of a woman, no matter how powerful he is. Yet historically, and still today, this truth is often ignored. In many societies, powerful men who do as they please go unquestioned. So why are we convinced that women are brave, strong, and inherently valuable?
Though I’m neither as brave nor strong as I would like, as a follower of Jesus, here is part of my answer: the God who made the world created people, both male and female, to represent him and reflect his goodness. Every human possesses inherent dignity, purpose, and immense worth.
Tragically, humanity turned from God. Powerful men abusing women does not reflect their Creator’s character. But if we are honest, many of our own thoughts, words and actions also fail to reflect goodness and love.
Yet God valued humanity so highly that he did not abandon us. Two thousand years ago, he sent his Son, Jesus, to live the perfect life we never could. Jesus served others, dignified women whom society pushed aside, and made people whole—physically and spiritually.
The cross is the greatest proof of the value Jesus places on people. His crucifixion was a terrible travesty of justice: a shameful death of a criminal given to the best man who ever lived. But it was no mistake. Jesus said he came to “give his life as a ransom for many”, to bring us back to the Father.
In “Ice Cream Man”, RAYE sings of the producer shifting blame: “you made me frame myself for your sins”, leading to her silently blaming herself. This should never happen.
We should not bear shame for others’ wrongdoing. We can be glad God won’t let abusers escape justice forever, while acknowledging our own wrongdoing against others and against God. Yet Jesus died to deal with these sins.
You may have endured experiences as awful as RAYE describes—or worse. But know this: Jesus is the safest man you will ever meet. Whatever your gender, your past, or what has been done to you, you can come to him. He will set you free and walk with you in love. Even if people claiming to follow Jesus have hurt you or ignored your pain, go straight to Jesus himself.
Read in the Bible (John 4:1-42)how he treated a woman who was rejected by society and lived in shame. Notice the dignity God’s Son gave her, and the ease she felt with him. Jesus will never put shame on you; he removes it and honours all who come to him.
Like RAYE, we rightly believe we can be brave and strong, and that we possess a dignity that should never be violated.
Will you consider faith in the One who gives you dignity; who made you, loves you, and calls you back to himself? Read John 4:1-42